the world today
Where I'm at...
It seems that my family is sort of on track. My mom is living in a new place. One that is close to our family friend, only three houses away. My brother and his family are sorta on track. He has a decent job, a wife, and a child at home. Minus the maybe party problem and neglect of his son, they could be a somewhat happy family. If only he would realize that neglect is abuse, and maybe the worst kind. Our father was similiar. He'd neglect that he had children, with the exception of two weekends out of the month. We'd go to the doughnut shop or to the seven-eleven for our candy... bribery for the poor parenting. This would make him feel better... can't say he never did anything! But it wasn't for our benefit.... it was to relieve his conscious. I do remember a few good times with my father... like the time he showed up to my viola performance at the high school, drunk and reeking of beer. It was a nice gesture that he was there, but I was so embarrassed that he was a drunk.
I realize now that my father never reached his full potential, he wasn't even close. He was a very average person, if not unhealthy person in his life. Now, I'm not speaking of health... I am talking about his personality and his being. He could have been great. He could have been something. He had high potential and a family he almost did right by. He was smart, driven person... So what went wrong?
Drug dependency.
Selfishness.
Lack of showing emotion or allowing himself to be emotional because of the drug (alcohol) addiction.
Money hungry.
So now where is he? I don't know and I probably won't ever find out. He made the choice.
Where does this leave my family? Hopefully not in the circle... that repetitive cycle in which we become like our parents for fear of never being better than them.
It is Easter. But it doesn't feel like Easter because I don't have my family around anymore. They are on the opposite coast. Easter has become something that people associate with food and beverages. It is an occasion we can over look because it doesn't have an impact on our lives today. I never thought I would become one of those... the sterotypical catholic who attends mass but twice a year and dares to call him/herself catholic. This isn't a club or joke. But it might as well be.
That's right, who needs family? All we need in life is success and to make ourselves feel good. Well shit, I should be out making tons of money, sleeping with the whole world and going to church twice a year!!!! Isn't that what society has deemed right? Isn't that what the majority of the population wants? I should also wear my hair long and flowing, become bulemic and wear slutty clothing to catch the attention of others (men and women alike!). I should drink more, eat less, party more, make more money, buy a house, have a car, go to the best hair salon to have my hair cut, colored, highlighted, blown out and styled, wax my eyebrows and my facial hair, get a "mani/pedi" once a week, make sure I take care of my stresses in my back by getting a back massage (spa week is coming up, you know!!!), dine like the wealthy at expensive restaurants eating god knows what (probably testicals from an endangered species), shop at generic clothing stores such as the gap or banana republic or macy's, buy the pointing shoes that hurt but look great, whiten my teeth with white strips but follow up with a trip to the dentist to spend hundreds if not thousands of dollars on cosmetic dentistry, spend thousands of dollars getting a boob job because my boobs are only a B cup! and they should be a DD, then i'll spend tens of thousands to have botox injected to my laugh lines to take away my smile, silicon injected into my lips to make them bigger (and more enticing to men because they believe they will enjoy a better blow job), then I will paralyze my face permanently with a nice face lift to rid myself of any individuality that I may have had, and finally I will get liposuction done to suck out the rest of the fat that the bulemia did not cure so that I can fit into the petite's section and possibly be the next candidate for America's Top Model.
But I'm cute right?
No, SEXY!!!!
Stay tuned...
America's Most Wanted is next.
Go read a fuck'n book.
It seems that my family is sort of on track. My mom is living in a new place. One that is close to our family friend, only three houses away. My brother and his family are sorta on track. He has a decent job, a wife, and a child at home. Minus the maybe party problem and neglect of his son, they could be a somewhat happy family. If only he would realize that neglect is abuse, and maybe the worst kind. Our father was similiar. He'd neglect that he had children, with the exception of two weekends out of the month. We'd go to the doughnut shop or to the seven-eleven for our candy... bribery for the poor parenting. This would make him feel better... can't say he never did anything! But it wasn't for our benefit.... it was to relieve his conscious. I do remember a few good times with my father... like the time he showed up to my viola performance at the high school, drunk and reeking of beer. It was a nice gesture that he was there, but I was so embarrassed that he was a drunk.
I realize now that my father never reached his full potential, he wasn't even close. He was a very average person, if not unhealthy person in his life. Now, I'm not speaking of health... I am talking about his personality and his being. He could have been great. He could have been something. He had high potential and a family he almost did right by. He was smart, driven person... So what went wrong?
Drug dependency.
Selfishness.
Lack of showing emotion or allowing himself to be emotional because of the drug (alcohol) addiction.
Money hungry.
So now where is he? I don't know and I probably won't ever find out. He made the choice.
Where does this leave my family? Hopefully not in the circle... that repetitive cycle in which we become like our parents for fear of never being better than them.
It is Easter. But it doesn't feel like Easter because I don't have my family around anymore. They are on the opposite coast. Easter has become something that people associate with food and beverages. It is an occasion we can over look because it doesn't have an impact on our lives today. I never thought I would become one of those... the sterotypical catholic who attends mass but twice a year and dares to call him/herself catholic. This isn't a club or joke. But it might as well be.
That's right, who needs family? All we need in life is success and to make ourselves feel good. Well shit, I should be out making tons of money, sleeping with the whole world and going to church twice a year!!!! Isn't that what society has deemed right? Isn't that what the majority of the population wants? I should also wear my hair long and flowing, become bulemic and wear slutty clothing to catch the attention of others (men and women alike!). I should drink more, eat less, party more, make more money, buy a house, have a car, go to the best hair salon to have my hair cut, colored, highlighted, blown out and styled, wax my eyebrows and my facial hair, get a "mani/pedi" once a week, make sure I take care of my stresses in my back by getting a back massage (spa week is coming up, you know!!!), dine like the wealthy at expensive restaurants eating god knows what (probably testicals from an endangered species), shop at generic clothing stores such as the gap or banana republic or macy's, buy the pointing shoes that hurt but look great, whiten my teeth with white strips but follow up with a trip to the dentist to spend hundreds if not thousands of dollars on cosmetic dentistry, spend thousands of dollars getting a boob job because my boobs are only a B cup! and they should be a DD, then i'll spend tens of thousands to have botox injected to my laugh lines to take away my smile, silicon injected into my lips to make them bigger (and more enticing to men because they believe they will enjoy a better blow job), then I will paralyze my face permanently with a nice face lift to rid myself of any individuality that I may have had, and finally I will get liposuction done to suck out the rest of the fat that the bulemia did not cure so that I can fit into the petite's section and possibly be the next candidate for America's Top Model.
But I'm cute right?
No, SEXY!!!!
Stay tuned...
America's Most Wanted is next.
Go read a fuck'n book.
posted by Jenn & John at 12:32 AM
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