The possibilities...
I got so damn emotional over the stupidest thing tonight. WTF?
Women vs Hormones
I absolutely hate that I can watch an adorable comercial with cute animals or people hugging... something ridiculous like that... and I feel like tears are welling up in my eyes. Mind you this doesn't happen all of the time, but when it does, it hits you like a sack of bricks. I hate that I get pissed off at the most idiotic things and not realize what I am doing. My bestfriend Lans use to call me on it when I went through a mood. "You're in a bitchy mood, huh?" And I'd hate to admit it,but I was and for what reason? There is no reason other than the damn freak'n hormones. However, can I blame the hormones without taking responsibility? Hardly.
When I was growing up, I had this picturesque life planned out. I would have my doctorate by the time I was 28, I'd enjoy sleeping in on Saturdays and not have to worry about anyone else's life but my own. I would live life carefree and have the support of my family, but not have to answer to them. I would dream of going to a job I'd enjoy, all the while putting some money in the bank to buy my first house. I'd have a dependable car, my cats and quite possibly a caring significant other. But the one idea and feeling that sticks out the most is that of peace. Waking up without worry. Having happiness, for myself as well as those around me. I guess it could still happen, it just seems so far out of my reach.
I got a job offer in the music field starting in 2007. I just don't want to settle here. So I doubt I will take it or even look into it more. Am I just ungrateful? Am I chasing a dream that might never happen? I guess I'll find out.
Women vs Hormones
I absolutely hate that I can watch an adorable comercial with cute animals or people hugging... something ridiculous like that... and I feel like tears are welling up in my eyes. Mind you this doesn't happen all of the time, but when it does, it hits you like a sack of bricks. I hate that I get pissed off at the most idiotic things and not realize what I am doing. My bestfriend Lans use to call me on it when I went through a mood. "You're in a bitchy mood, huh?" And I'd hate to admit it,but I was and for what reason? There is no reason other than the damn freak'n hormones. However, can I blame the hormones without taking responsibility? Hardly.
When I was growing up, I had this picturesque life planned out. I would have my doctorate by the time I was 28, I'd enjoy sleeping in on Saturdays and not have to worry about anyone else's life but my own. I would live life carefree and have the support of my family, but not have to answer to them. I would dream of going to a job I'd enjoy, all the while putting some money in the bank to buy my first house. I'd have a dependable car, my cats and quite possibly a caring significant other. But the one idea and feeling that sticks out the most is that of peace. Waking up without worry. Having happiness, for myself as well as those around me. I guess it could still happen, it just seems so far out of my reach.
I got a job offer in the music field starting in 2007. I just don't want to settle here. So I doubt I will take it or even look into it more. Am I just ungrateful? Am I chasing a dream that might never happen? I guess I'll find out.
posted by Jenn & John at 1:50 AM
2 Comments:
Hey... what job offer did you get?
Oh.. and hope you're doing well... give me a call sometime...
AS
yeah! me too!
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